Arden Four Months

My little chunk is four months old!

Here are her stats:
Weight - 14lbs 2.5oz (63%)
Length - 25 inches (77%)
Head Circumference - 16 inches (42%)

...And she's wearing 9 month clothes at this point. I feel like she is way heavier than Avery but she is only one pound more than she was at this age. And it seems (according to the percentiles) she is middle of the road. Maybe all the rolls and double chin are throwing me off! :)

Apparently she looks just like me. (I'm on the left, Arden's on the right.)

I feel like she has developed quite the personality over the last month. She loves smiling and laughing (she's ticklish). She also kicks all. the. time. When she is on my lap I have to block her feet or she'll kick me to death. And I get soaked while giving her a bath from her kicking.

She has discovered her feet and her ability to spit. And she rolled over for the first time on January 9 (from tummy to back). 

She's been doing good in her own room. She takes about five 30 minute naps during the day but usually only wakes up once at night, so I'll take it. I remember the short naps drove me NUTS with Avery, but I learned from her there is nothing you can do about it, so I just go with it. Avery eventually grew out of it and I know she will too. This time it doesn't bother me so much because I am up all day with Avery anyway so it's not like I'm hoping for a nap of my own or anything.

Judge me if you will but she still sleeps in the swing. Avery did for six months and she's fine so I figure I'll move her eventually. 

Before she goes to sleep, she makes all this noise. We call it her "sleepy song." I sing "Jesus Loves Me" to her each time before putting her down and Rustin thinks it's her trying to sing along. I always know if she's making those sing-songy sounds that she is about to go to sleep. It's super cute.

I know I've said this before but she is seriously the most chill baby ever! Maybe you have to be when you're not the only one?

Arden 3 Months and Christmas and a Wedding

Well nothing like doing Arden's three month update days before she turns four months. Better late than never right?? 

She didn't have a well visit at three months so I don't have her "stats." I'm curious to see what they are at her four month because she is quite the chunk! She is wearing six month clothes in these pictures. 

When I went to do her photo shoot, Avery woke up from her nap and insisted on being in some of the pictures.

Cute outtakes- 

Up until she was three months, she slept in our room - usually right next to me. I figured I would move her to her room at three months, but when it came I wasn't quite ready. Sure I wanted my nights back and all, but I loved her cuddled up next to me. And I knew when she went to her room, she wasn't ever coming back. So I thought of keeping her until four months but she started being more social and not such a sound sleeper. I used to be able to just lay her down next to me and she would fall asleep while Rustin and I watched TV but she started not wanting to lay down with me, but play instead and the TV kept her awake so I figured it was time. I moved her in there and was bracing myself for the worst, but she really did ok with the transition. 

Here are a few more of her - 

Christmas was really fun this year with it being Arden's first and Avery being really into it. She had a "Christmas T-shirt Parade" at her preschool. They made shirts with angels on them using their footprint and handprints and wore the shirts as they marched down the hall ringing bells and singing songs while the parents watched. It was SUPER cute! 

Avery also attended her second wedding. One of my long-time friends, Shelby, got married and I was in the house party. 

She had a BLAST! The two girls in the picture above hung out with her the whole time and held her hand while they walked around. It was SO cute! They also went to the photo booth a few times by themselves. The pictures were pretty hilarious. That was sort of the first time at an event where she has gone off by herself. Usually she sticks by us and will only go somewhere if we go with her. Although we were glad she's now confident enough to do that, it was a little bittersweet. She's growing up too fast! 

We celebrated Christmas early in Wichita Falls. On the anniversary of my Grandad's passing we went to the cemetery and let him meet Arden. 

She was also able to meet her future husband, Luke. He is my friend Sarah's baby and was born about three weeks after Arden. 

 And then we were back in Allen for Christmas Eve/Day with Rustin's family. 

Hopefully I will be a little more timely with the next update. No promises though :)

Life with Two

How is life with two kids?

I get asked that question a lot lately. It's not a bad question at all, but since I have been asked it so much it has forced me to think more deeply about it than my typical response of "Oh we're making it."

The real answer is it's stinkin' hard. But I haven't wanted to say that. I feel like I don't have a "right" to say that. I know people with three, four, heck I even personally know a woman with 12 kids. What right do I have to say two- just two - kids are hard?? Not only do I only have two kids, but I stay home, I have a supportive husband, and just the fact that I live in the United States means I have many MANY more luxuries than my fellow moms in say Africa.

But knowing all of those things doesn't make it less hard. I think being aware of how fortunate I am is good because it creates a sense of gratitude in me, but sometimes it creates a feeling of worthlessness. Because it's not really helpful to see the woman with 12 kids wearing something other than sweat pants (an act I have not been able to pull off in days). It makes me feel like even more of a failure. (If she can do it, why can't I??) I think at times we have to allow ourselves to be ok with the fact that we're struggling.

I remember it was hard with just one kid. Avery only took 20 minute naps and when she was awake she was crying. I went from having free time to zero free time. Side note to people without kids: you may think you have no free time now because you're busy with work, etc. and I'm not discounting that, but please, just take pleasure in the fact that you can use the restroom ALONE.

Now with two I have even less free time. Maybe that sounds selfish of me that I need free time, but hear me out - I am an introvert and if you have ever done the Myers Briggs testing you know that the difference between and introvert and extrovert is not how good you are at talking to people, it's where you get your energy. Extroverts get their energy from others, and introverts get their energy from alone/down time. We need some time to just recharge with no one around. And now I no longer have that recharge time that I NEED.

At least with Avery (when she got older) she napped during the day so I had a few hours there, then she went to bed at a somewhat decent hour and I got a few more hours before I went to sleep. Now I think they have conspired so that one of them is awake at all times. I kid you not, there have been days that the SECOND I put one of them down to nap, the other immediately wakes up and it continues like that all day.

And let's talk about going places. I need to get out of the house. Even though I am an introvert, believe it or not, I do like being around people. In fact, I NEED to be around other people sometimes or I go insane. But I pretty much can't leave the house unless I'm going to a place with childcare and only women (because I just can't bring myself to nurse in front of men). Arden takes 40 minute naps every 1.5 hours, and she eats every 2-3 hours. So if you want to try to do the math that leaves me about one 30 minute window to go somewhere, but 30 minutes is how long it now takes us to all get into the car.

It's an adjustment, and I keep telling myself it WILL get better (it did with Avery). But for all you other moms out there with only one or two kids who are struggling and then you see the mom of 12 with actual pants on (you know, ones that button) and then you feel like a failure, just know you are not alone. It's hard. And just because some people have it harder, contrary to popular opinion, that does not somehow make it easier for you.

And a little PSA for husbands: When your wife is confiding in you how she's having a hard time, the worst thing you can do is to remind her how so-and-so did it/is doing it and is fine. You're welcome.